We’ve all heard the phrase, “You are what you eat.”
It’s easy to understand that whatever foods we feast on will have a direct impact on the number staring back at us on the weighing scales.
But what about our mental diet?
What we feed our brain has a profound effect on our mental well-being.
Yet how many of us are keeping check on what we are feasting on?
When we overeat for a few months we can see a noticeable change by looking in the mirror. However, it’s much harder to notice the effects of our mental diet.
You are what you watch
If you sit around watching 24-hour news and reading sensationalist tabloid newspapers, your mind will be overloaded with fearful and depressive stories.
Researchers at Texas Tech University found that people who obsessively follow the news are more likely to suffer from elevated levels of anxiety, stress and live with mental ill-health.
What we watch will shape our perspectives, influence our behaviour, and contribute to our mental and emotional state. Are our thoughts really our own?
The reverse is also true. Researchers have found increasing levels of creativity, alertness and curiosity when a subject watches educational content and documentaries.
For most of us we will switch on the TV this evening. In fact, watching television is the most popular past time and if you live to the age of 78, approximately 15 years will have been spent watching television. Pretty frightening.
Add on top Youtube, podcasts, TikTok, radio and it’s easy to understand that we are what we watch.
I cut out reading and watching the news about 3 or 4 years ago. Purely because I had noticed that my mood changes after watching the news.
It turns out that you don’t miss much. If something is really important you will hear about it anyway and then can choose to look into it if it interests you.
But most of the news is total garbage that adds very little value to your life, but has a tremendous impact on our mental health.
You are what you believe
If you think you’re not good enough, you’ll never be worthy.
If you think the world is against you, nothing will go your way.
If you think you’re an unlucky person, bad luck will find you.
What we believe has a funny way of being proven true.
You may have heard about ‘The Law of Attraction’. Now before you run for the exit button I’m not going to start preaching The Secret. I’ll leave that to Oprah.
But I am a firm believer that what you believe and think about yourself ultimately ends up being true. Or should I say, it seems that way.
Take two people. One thinks they are unlucky and the other thinks they are lucky.
They both receive a phone call telling them they have lost their job.
The first person thinks, ‘Typical. Just my luck. Everything always gone wrong for me. I don’t even know why I bother'.’
The second person thinks ‘Damn, that’s a bummer. I guess right now so many people are losing their job so it’s not just me. Plus my boss was a bit of a dick. Maybe this is what I needed to start following my dreams'.
Too extreme?
Same two people. They get in their car to go to work and the car doesn’t start.
The first person thinks, ‘Typical. Just my luck. Everything always gone wrong for me. I don’t even know why I bother.’
The second person thinks, ‘Damn, that’s a bummer. I’m lucky the car lasted this long. I was expecting this at some point. Anyway, at least I get to work from home today.’
These are of course totally made up scenarios at very opposite end of the spectrum. But bad luck always finds unlucky people.
This is a mindset switch to make. It’s not easy to do.
But you are what you believe and your self-talk has a huge impact on your experience with the world.
Be careful who you listen to. Especially yourself.
You are who you hang around with
You might’ve heard the phrase, ‘you are the average of the 5 people you hang around with’ or ‘show me your friends and I’ll show you your future’.
Again this is a little pithy but the premise is true.
How many times have you heard ‘I started hanging around the wrong circles’.
Usually, that’s a line fed by someone who has done something wrong.
But again, the premise is true.
Humans are mimetic creatures. We copy people around us. If you moved to Australia, in a few short months the way you say certain words will have changed.
If somebody else has their legs crossed with their hands on their lap, we copy them without even think about it.
Those closest to us affect our thoughts, beliefs, decisions, esteem and behaviour.
That’s why communities are the most powerful social mechanisms. We seek out people who think the way we do and we hang out with them more.
Who we hang around with is a huge contribution to our mental diet.
That’s why it’s so important to cut out toxic people, unsupportive people, jealous people, the list goes on. Their thoughts are self-fulfilling - they are what they believe!
And again the reverse is true! Surround yourself with optimists, people that are curious, intelligent, and supportive.
People who are chasing their dreams are far more interesting than the people who talk about the people chasing their dreams.
Question your own mental diet
Monday is a beautiful day to reflect on your own mental diet. Have a think about what your brain is feasting on.
What are you consuming and how do you feel afterwards? What are you reading online? How many hours did you spend watching shallow, unfulfilling TikToks?
What do you tell yourself everyday? What do you believe about yourself? What do you believe about the world?
And ask yourself am I really like that. Or am I just meeting my own expectations.
Who are you hanging around with? Do you have a support network? Is there somebody else out there who is on a similar path that you can chat with?
Community is extremely powerful. A small gathering of like-minded individuals can be an unstoppable force. For good or for evil.
Read last week’s edition, The Transtheoretical Model of Habit Change
Good lessons, Jake. I moved from New York to a smaller city in high school. The news went from celebrity newscasters talking about international topics to yokels talking about shoveling snow. That's when I quit TV news and eventually gave up news altogether. On the rare occasions I read it today, immediately I feel agitated and unsettled. A periodic reminder of why the news is bad for mental wellbeing.